The Juggling Act: Navigating a Neurodivergent Life
Life with a neurodivergent mind and chronic pain is a constant balancing act. For me, this involves juggling five podcasts, a full-time job, a side hustle, and chronic migraines. While it may seem like a lot, it is a rhythm I've been accustomed to since childhood. My journey began with a childhood of frequent travel and homeschooling, which forced me to develop a proactive work ethic. I learned to work ahead on school assignments, whether on an airplane or in a car, to ensure I didn't fall behind. I also had to balance my studies with extracurriculars like skiing, fishing, and running. This early training in managing a full schedule prepared me for the complexities of adulthood.
In high school, the juggling intensified. I had to balance my schoolwork with therapy—both individual and group—and the demanding process of writing my victim impact statement and college application essays. This period was emotionally challenging, as I grappled with the trauma of sexual abuse and family drama. However, these unique experiences and extracurriculars are what I believe ultimately distinguished my college applications. It was a testament to the idea that a person's life is not defined by their struggles, but by how they navigate them.
The balancing act continued in college, where I managed my schoolwork and therapy alongside my chronic migraines. I was diagnosed with NLD at 19, but my daily migraines went undiagnosed until after graduation. These were not just headaches; they were what I call "sledgehammer" migraines—intense, debilitating pain that felt like a continuous cycle. I would try to sleep or exercise to find relief, only for the pain to return as soon as I woke up. It was a reminder that chronic conditions often require a constant search for new solutions as the body becomes accustomed to medication, leaving you feeling like a "lab rat."
The Intersection of Neurodiversity and Chronic Pain
My experiences with both NLD and chronic migraines have taught me a great deal about comorbidity and how different conditions can interact. As I wrote in a 2022 article, it is often more difficult for me to handle the daily pain of migraines than the challenges of NLD. According to Medical News Today, a migraine is a severe headache disorder with symptoms that are more intense and debilitating than a typical headache. There are many types of migraines, from sinus and ocular to tension and rebound. They do not always present with head pain, but the impact on daily life is significant.
The challenge of juggling these conditions extends to the professional world. As Steve Forbes notes in his article, "Embrace New Diversity in the Workplace to Meet Your Business Needs," companies can benefit from hiring neurodivergent individuals like those with NLD. While NLD can present challenges with visual-spatial reasoning and social communication, it also comes with unique strengths such as strong verbal intelligence, excellent long-term memory, and an attention to detail. Forbes argues that the subjective experience of living with NLD, which often involves a lifetime of "managing risk" and scrutinizing social interactions, can make an individual uniquely suited for careers that require foresight and consideration.
This focus on strengths is echoed in a 2018 article by Sally, which offers three tips for adults with NLD seeking employment:
Focus on strengths: Emphasize positive attributes like a strong auditory memory and attention to detail.
Practice makes perfect: Prepare for interviews with mock sessions that cover both verbal and non-verbal cues.
Outline all aspects of the job: Understand not only the duties but also the social nuances of a typical workday to prepare for any "curveballs."
These tips are a reminder that preparation and self-advocacy are key to success.
Understanding and Navigating Social Challenges
A significant part of living with NLD is learning to navigate social situations. As Aleem notes in his article, "Learning to Understand the Proper Social and Communication Skills," many individuals with NLD struggle with understanding social cues, which can lead to social isolation and misinterpretation. I can relate to this from my own experiences in Girl Scouts, where I was often excluded from cliques and didn't understand why I was being made fun of. Eventually, I learned to prioritize my own happiness and choose to spend time with the people I genuinely connected with, a valuable skill that has served me well into adulthood.
Another article by Marisa Eckhardt, "NLD Unmet Learning Challenges," highlights the academic and professional difficulties that can arise from NLD. Eckhardt notes that while NLD students are often bright and do well with facts and logic, they can struggle with higher-level language skills like figurative or inferential language. This can impact reading comprehension and the ability to identify main ideas. A key challenge is the tendency to get lost in details, which can make it difficult to get to the point, both in speech and in writing.
This is a challenge I still face, although I am more aware of it now. I have learned to be humble about my limitations, especially in areas like technology where I may not know everything. When a coworker needed help with a tech issue, I offered my assistance but was upfront about the fact that I might not be able to solve it. This humility and transparency allowed me to avoid a situation where I might have overpromised and underdelivered.
I hope that my personal experiences and these insights into NLD and chronic pain have been helpful. By understanding and embracing the unique challenges of our journeys, we can better navigate the world and advocate for ourselves and others.
Links for articles and a link for the podcast episode:
https://www.forbes.com/sites/steveforbes/2020/06/10/embrace-neurodiversity-in-the-workplace-to-meet-your-business-needs/?sh=ee8dfdd27834
https://nvld.org/understand-proper-social-communication-cues/
smartkidswithld.org/getting-help/nld/nld-unmet-learning-challenges/
